So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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