Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
