I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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