you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
zippers are such a cool invention
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize