you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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