just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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