gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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