She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
