I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
