Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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