More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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