yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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