girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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