i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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