people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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