No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Randomize
