I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
