So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
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