Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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