HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Alive.
So much puke
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
