her vagine was all disorganized.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
