My brain says no but my pants say off.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
