Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
