I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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