i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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