last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
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