Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She's the barista slut.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I have feelings that need drinking.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Randomize
