i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
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