Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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