I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
