I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
