420 ftw
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
