suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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