i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize