just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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