Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
