At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
My life is pants optional.
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