There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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