The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
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