He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
