i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
