I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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