my soul wont recognize me after tonight
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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