I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
