i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
