What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
The adults are the big ones right?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
