Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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