I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
