I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize