some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
